Q: Love and Freedom

Some would think of prison as a physical confinement. That ‘some’ would not be wrong. But to see prison solely as a physical thing is erroneous…

There is somewhat a cliché phrase for anyone who has been imprisoned for a time… “Just being in prison, doesn’t mean you’re not free. And just because you’re free, doesn’t mean you’re not in prison.” It refers to being confined mentally. Many who are in prison are not confined mentally. I believe I am one who is mentally free.

My mind is not bound by time, as I’m always looking to the future… nor is it bound by space – I do not allow the concrete, steel, and occasional BS to invade my thoughts. It was not always like that for me. It is a level of mind I reached within the first five years of my incarceration. I’m not sure exactly what thought came to me and changed my mind, but something altered the way I see the world. Alter is a strong word, but it felt as if I was finally truly myself.

I believe that the spirit of an individual houses one’s faith. When we speak of faith, most commonly one can’t see its true effect if not for confidence. Whatever came to me gave me a great sense of confidence. This confidence was not solely in myself – it gave me confidence in the idea that if I pursued righteousness unwaveringly, that I would be looked after by the universe (God). Ever since that moment of understanding, I’ve prayed only to become more attuned to that sense.

I’ve stayed true to that idea. Unwaveringly? I’m getting there. Everyday, moving towards that image… and as promised, the universe has kept me. It has supplied me with a unmatched divine love in the form of my fiancé, who has been a light and a motive force for me, who believes in me. I really can’t tell the difference between the universe and her. She is literally my everything. I do not believe that our being to together is anything outside of divine intervention. My dreams, my hopes, and my prayers all seem possible through her… I dare not say I understand the universal force and its grand design, but if it is anything like people say it is, then undoubtedly, it answered my prayers by sending an angel…

I ask everyone who believes that God is Love, to remain open and increase in your faith, fore God is real and is always listening… and benevolent… and always answers prayers.

– Q, 2/9/21

Joint Meditation: “If you and I are possible, anything is possible.”

Celebrating our 10th month together, Q and I spent some time meditating yesterday and building our spiritual force.

“My meditation was good. It focused on the nature of God. My focal point was the force that brought us together… It’s the same force that sets everything in motion… the Force, babe… all the destiny involved in our chanced love. It was all set in motion by a force. This force guides all things to their purpose and position. We can become more familiar with this force by trying to feel its influence in our entire relationship… God is Love. Seek the nature of love, you’ll find the nature of God… Feel the force that pushes us together and feel how that force is enveloping the whole universe. That’s God…”

– Q, Note to S, 6/14/20

He continues to teach me so much about my own spiritual power and faith, aiding me on my spiritual journey. I’m so grateful. With his guidance, I had my own exploration.

I focused on what you’ve called the force. What was cool about it was it was easy to weave in and out of what was going through me. I kept getting flashes of us and how we are just straight up POSSIBLE. If you and I are possible, anything is possible.

-S, Note to Q, 6/15/20

After my meditation and prayer on the subject, I grabbed our notebook which was nearby, and started to write. A reflection, I guess you can call it. Here’s a little bit of it.

“The nature of God… the force… destiny. I could see us. Day 1 until now, the future. Thinking of all the things that brought us together, even though odds were low. We overcame them one by one. We were supposed to know eachother.

I saw colors… blue and orange mixed together, like a sunset. The sky. I saw us, harnessing our power. I feel we are going to change the world. I think you hold the blue, and me the orange – together, we make a big energy that’s pinkish purpleish. It’s beautiful. I could see it.”

– S, 6/14/20, Notebook

From now on, Q and I are going to try and have a meditation each month on the 14th, focusing on our power. Our force.

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