This weekend has been trying, as we have endured some challenges with grasping what it means to manage the various and plentiful emotions that come along with our situation.
In the minutes we’ve had this morning speaking, I mentioned the difficulties that come along with thinking of him when I’m in certain places. Feelings of missing him, anger at the fact that he’s away, regret in allowing his presence to be in that space, anxiety. Pure anxiety.
He reminded me that I am not my mind or my thoughts and that it’s okay to feel those feelings. That thinking makes me human, and when I stop thinking I stop living. That my mind isn’t who I am.
About a few hours later, I went to a yoga class and the teacher happened to say something along the lines of “remember, you are not your thoughts,” proving further that the universe wanted to show me something today. To have patience with myself and my situation.
In our conversations today, we highlighted the themes of the weekend to be: presence and balance.
With so much talk about the future, sometimes we forget what it means to take each other for what we are today, and not just what we will be. We’ve also been working on our constant love and life balance, trying to make sure we remain disciplined and fully understanding of each of our situations. Managing how many phone calls we have and how to make the most of our time. Just overall being mindful.
In short, I believe that spending some time meditating more often will help me become more present in my thoughts. I’ve been using an app as a beginner, on and off for a while. But now, having Q to give me tips, pointers, and inspiration to continue my path to a more manageable mind, I feel confident that I can achieve it.
-S
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